Thursday, September 26, 2013

10 Things I Hate About Being Unemployed

Okay, so I'm not fully unemployed.. if I'm lucky, I will be asked to "work" at someone's house a couple hours a week.  There, I will steam a couple awesome lines of Resort & Boutique Wear, clean their kitchen, Swifter their floors, maybe-- if I'm REAL lucky, I get asked to clean their bathroom (I am NOT complaining- the people are awesome).  But, I'm usually home everyday, thinking of what I can clean next, what I will cook Rob for dinner, or what Bravo will rerun next.  I cannot take it.  

Most of you would think that I would enjoy laying around in my PJs, but I don't.  When Rob gets up, I'm up (around 6am). There's no going back to sleep once I'm up.  I nap when I'm pregnant or sick-- I am neither.  So after thinking of ALL the reasons why I hate being unemployed, I came up with some of the most aggravating reasons-- they aren't my Top 10 or anything and I could add to them, they were just the first that came to mind. (Let me add-- I do not collect unemployment. Won't even go there, K thanks!)

1. Cabin Fever-- Hanging out at the house is no longer fun because it's become your new norm. Most people look forward to getting off work, coming home, and relaxing on the couch but that's pretty much what you've done all day.

2. When your friends are all talking about their jobs, how tired they are/over worked, or their new, hot co-worker.. all you have to talk about is what Judge Mathis told a crackhead on his show the day before.

3. You have watched every show that Bravo, Netflix, Hulu, and MTv has to offer.. plus all of the reruns and your DVD collection, twice.

4. All of the retired women at the pool have given you advice on how to get a job, suggested you go back to school (but never offer to pay for books and tuition-damn!), or told you that your biological clock is ticking and you might as well start a family.

5. Getting emails for sales that you can't enjoy.. Especially from Old Navy that continues to send me stuff stating I can have 30% off.  Boo!

6. Your dog is the only person you converse with during the day.
(You know your day is boring when your dog passes out in your lap like this)

7. Every time your phone rings, you think it could be a company calling you to set up an interview but instead it's someone you know calling to see if you have a job yet.

8. You forget what it's like to wear makeup, because why would you need to wear it when you just sit at home.

9. Even your neighbors start noticing your schedules or routines.

10. The days all run together.  One day it's the beginning of the week and in a blink of the eye it's the weekend and you still don't have a job.


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